Wierd World
Prime Munter
William Hague has a big lead over Tony Blair in the sex appeal stakes. According to an online survey the Tory leader is 22% more appealing to young women than the Prime Minister. The results were obtained from a survey by the Virgin Group of 1,650 students aged between 19 and 25. James Layfield, brand manager of Virgin-student.com, said "We are rather surprised by the results, in particular that Hague is more attractive than Blair. It appears that he is regarded as more affectionate." The Prime Minister, however, still holds the lead among homosexual men. A massive 80% of homosexual men say they would prefer to sleep with the Labour leader rather than his Tory opposite number. Ann Widdecome was also voted twice as attractive as Mo Mowlam by straight men.
Dead certain?
A hibernating hamster was saved from cremation by staff at a vet's surgery in the West Midlands. A shoebox "coffin" containing Benny the hamster and the £8 cremation fee had been left on the counter of a Sedgeley surgery while a nurse was on the phone. "We check every animal that comes in for cremation," said Practice Manager, Val Marsh, "and a very faint heartbeat was found. It was a fluke really because under normal circumstances it would have been buried." Benny's owners were traced through a newspaper appeal featuring the children's sympathy cards left in his "coffin". One of his owners, eight-year-old Georgina Williams, was stunned when she saw a picture of her "dead" pet staring out from the front page of the paper. Benny has now been reunited with his owners and is recovering from his ordeal at home.
Barmy Beeb
BBC bosses have produced an expensive brochure to tell staff how they should "sit on their bottoms". The leaflet, designed to stop staff getting stressed at their desks, also has a 21-stage diagram on how to fold a paper bird when things get too much. If all else fails, the 57-page booklet advises that workers should sniff lavender and stare at a picture of the Alps. "If employers recognise stress is making people less productive", a Company spokesman argued, " it is sensible and responsible to offer sound advice on ways to combat it." Such concern for staff welfare has a long precedent at the BBC. A memo in December told BBC staff how to use the new revolving doors and one at Radio Sheffield recently gave instructions on how to use a kettle.
15th Feb 2001