fashion
There is a soft but insistent humming in Oxford this week, winding insidiously through our cobbled streets, and buzzing in the ears of savvy shoppers everywhere. If one listens closely, one can discern some of the key words: Have. You. Been. To. Primark. Heavens to Betsy, there is a discount retailer in town, and she has opened up in the Westgate Centre for all of her bargain mad devotees.
I would like to say fi rstly that Primark is a bit like sugary cereal: an euphoric rush, followed by misapprehension and doubt, followed by apathy. Primark does disposable clothes, and it does them well.
Where else can you fi nd a metallic handbag for three pounds? Or a stripey tunic for a fi ver? One exquisite aspect of Primark is the lack of any buyer’s remorse on the part of its devotees because the investment is microscopic compared not only to the nicer shops, but even to High Street stand-bys like Topshop and Miss Selfridges. If fashion is about luxury, what is Primark? To be perfectly honest, people who think fashion is about luxury are quite dim.
In many ways, fashion is about movement, and Primark cleanly fi ts into this paradigm. Primark doesn’t pretend to put heirlooms in your checkout bag (which is delightfully unpretentious, by the by); these are fun clothes, made for the moment. It is actually very refreshing to own a top that I would be nonplussed to have half a bottle of red wine spilled on at a very dodgy house party in the dark recesses of Cowley.
With this in mind, what should you buy from Primark without your wardrobe screaming, “My existence owes itself to Primark?” I would stay away from the shoes, as they do look cheap. Accessories wise, the jewelry isn’t too bad. Keep in mind, however, that you will undoubtedly see the same really cool necklace in the Bridge queue on a different girl. Four times.
Handbags wise, I would recommend buying the kookiest purse possible, and only taking it out occasionally; your everyday bag should be invested with a gravitas that Primark does not exactly lend itself to so it’d be far more respectable to go elsewhere. I personally think that the tops are where it is at: stripey, sparkly, in every colour you would ever want, and rarely exceeding fi ve pounds.
It is also important to keep in mind that it is much easier to make tops fi t correctly than any other item of clothing. Trousers and skirts wise, I fi nd that the fi tting and sizing is a bit odd, but when one considers that Primark must produce trousers in batches of fi ve bazillion, generic sizing that never quite fi ts makes sense. Go to Primark, my children, and glorify in kilos of trendy clothing for mere pennies.
23rd Feb 2006