The Krapton Factor

By Jeremy Cacksman

Hands off cocks, on socks. Come on, come on, we've haven't got all frigging day you know...

1) Can I kick it?

2) If God made the world then why are there so many horrid things in it? Like Lisa Tarbuck for example. I mean what is that about?

3) Where do you think you're going?

4) Which of these is not a London Underground station: Embankment, Waterloo, King's Cross, Felcher's Corner?

5) Who would win in a fight between a duvet and a sleeping bag?

6) Who da man? I said, who da man?

7) Why have elephants got big ears?

8) What is Paul Daniels' middle name?

Answers: 1) Yes but you'll have to pay for the bloody thing if it breaks, 2) It's a big joke. But not a particularly funny one. 3) Long Stanton as it happens, 4) They all are. You just have to know how to look... 5) The bag, it has teeth after all, 6) I da man. Oh yessir, damn sure. 7) Because Noddy's a right tosser. 8) Florence.

6th Jun 2002