Fashion
With finals encroaching, temperatures rising, and a clammy vapour of concentration seeming to emanate from the once chill and verdant dome of the Rad Cam, an Oxford styler's first priority ought without doubt to be keeping cool. In a metaphorical sense, naturally, but come the summertime the adjective in its original form also comes into play.
You were warned last week about the pitfalls of passé headgear; novel and ingenious ways to keep the sun off your face are becoming as precious as scholar's notes forgotten in the photocopy room.
With the trucker having well and truly driven off into the sunset, how now can a sensible styler ensure that her carefully-chosen shade of chestnut isn't tainted by UV-exposure unregulated by the expert hand of Tracy from The Tanning Shop? Darkest Cowley, perhaps the only area of Oxford left untouched by the blonde-and-bronzed Brookes Brigade, could just hold the solution.
Since time immemorial, the historical treasure trove that is Bead Games on the Cowley Road has promoted the gypsy look. With bejewelled and head scarved mannequins glittering, albeit somewhat dustily, from its mistily tinted windows, the wary passer-by can't help but be drawn by the eastern promise which seems to radiate from this murky enclave. A colourful head scarf is an ideal way to recreate this 'pantomime fortune teller' look - a look well worth keeping alive. After all, if anyone's going to be able to predict the trends of the future it's a bona fide mystic, and fairground favourite Psychic Sue seems to have been wearing them since she was but a twinkle in her father's crystal ball. These silky sensations allow you to recreate those halcyon days of real movie star glamour; although be warned that you're just as likely to be mistaken for some sort of exotic scout and told to stop showing off. However, this cunning disguise may well ensure that your tutors as well as errant summer insects keep out of your hair; and any item able to multi-task with such ease is to this slothful styler an instant essential.
So, with the sun's deadly rays and your tutor's deadly gaze deftly avoided in one fell satiny swoop, where next to tread on the path to sartorial summer perfection? Seasonal footwear is one of those horrendous hit-and-miss issues where you really do have to take the bull by the horns and run with it. With weather as unpredictable as is uniformly found on our green and pleasant land, the line between a flip and a flop is a very fine one.
When opting for sandals a build-up of about three sunny days is advised; any less is chancing it and any more can leave you with a nasty disparity of colour between ankle and foot. Brazilian Havaianas are the flip-flop of choice for any discerning beach-bum, but if the hefty price tag on this side of the ocean leaves you gasping like a fish out of water, a simple pair in a plain colour can be found in any seaside shop next to the inflatable mallets and indestructible rock. Just make sure you've packed your mirrored shades when the old gimp in the 'kiss me quick' hat beams your way.
On the subject of sunglasses, avoiding eye contact with lecherous septuagenarians are about the only thing mirrored lenses are good for. Leaving you looking like an extra from Baywatch, we should all be thankful that the production lines stopped making these around the time that Mitch turned his hand to a singing career. If going for a headscarf, shades should be dark and elegant.
Anything too shiny or fussy, when compounded with the scarf, will leave you looking like a St Tropez gold-digger, although extravagant shades can complete a simple outfit such as a white shirt and shorts with punchy poolside panache.
In short, summer is a time when anything really goes. Looks you'd usually save for a costume party should be dragged out of the dressing-up trunk; if you're not brave enough to sport gypsy rose-lee, you should accessorise as if your life depended on it.
But be warned; the costume does not guarantee any sort of accompanying psychic prowess, and if your new look does not end up being favourably embraced by all and sundry, this susceptible styler is not to be blamed.
Whilst the crystal ball may well be this week's favourite sartorial friend, in the fashion world, it's one that's as fickle as a fraudulent clairvoyant. If you want real advice, stick to Magic 8.
13th May 2004