Pass And Move, It's A Footballing Groove: Rob Evans on the tunes from the terraces
Euro 2004 is just around the corner. The final squads are being prepared and the last friendlies are being played in a few weeks. There's the debate over the squad: Beattie or Vassell? Should Thompson be given another chance? What has Gareth Barry done to annoy Sven? Will Beckham, Gerrard and Owen be fit? Is there a binge-drinking/gambling/naughty text message scandal around the corner? But perhaps the most important decision of them all has just been made. The official England Euro 2004 song will be All Together Now by The Farm, remixed by DJ Spoony.
Well, that'll be sung on the terraces won't it? Football and music rarely meet on even terms - just think back and remember Liverpool's infamous Anfield Rap (sample lyrics "Alright Aldo/Sound as a pound/I'm cushty la but there's nothing down /The rest of the lads ain't got it sussed/We'll have to learn 'em to talk like us"), Chas and Dave's four FA Cup Final songs from 1981 to 1991 and Ant and Dec's We're On The Ball. The spoof song in Mike Bassett: England Manager was depressingly accurate in its portrayal of a football song and proof that footballers can't sing: a terrace chant bit and Keith Allen.
But sometimes it works. As England basked in the warm summer of 1990, the World Cup in Italy gripped imaginations as England actually competed. The tournament made stars of players such as David Platt and Paul Gascoigne and heralded the emergence of African football, with the Cameroon side reaching the quarter finals.
It is also memorable, though, for New Order: somewhere along the line, the FA got a currently fashionable band to do the song. Well, it beats Back Home doesn't it? Plus, the song is nothing really to do with football. Apart from a snippet of the most famous commentary at the start, it could be just another New Order song. Until, that is, John Barnes kicks in. A good song then hits legendary status - the infamous rap begins with "You've to hold and give/but do it at the right time" and the typical terrace outro ("we're singing for England/Engerland") follows. Why is World In Motion so well remembered? Perhaps because it is actually good. You even forget Keith Allen's in there.
Fortunately for music fans, England failed to qualify for the 1994 World Cup but the Germans decided that their song would be a collaboration with the Village People. Well, there is a shared love of taches, tight jeans and mullets.
1996 was another hot summer, and the FA pulled another ace. In the height of Britpop, they got a reasonably popular Britpop band and coupled them with two popular comedians. What resulted was Three Lions - a three minute terrace chant.
Instead of the usual bravado and false hope, the lyrics talked of the numerous false starts, the defeats, the memories of success and of the hope, the belief that every football fan has - that this time it is going to be different, this time we are going to win.
Of course, England didn't win it. The Germans did and promptly started singing "football's coming hom" back to us. The instantly catchy chorus helped, and Three Lions was popular enough to accompany England to France in 1998. It also beat the official song, recorded by The Spice Girls, in the charts. The Scotland/Del Amitri effort in 1998 Don't Come Home Too Soon is quite notable, as Scotland did come home very quickly indeed, having lost 3-0 to Morocco.
Whatever song was recorded in 2000 was less memorable than England's performances and 2002 was just as bad. So what about All Together Now? It doesn't stand up against either World In Motion or Three Lions - there's nothing to sing along to, with neither the upbeat feeling of the former nor the lyrical content of the latter. It is a bad remix of an Everton cup final song, and the children's choir just makes it more laughable.
Even the mooted Blazin' Squad song would have been better, if only for the possibility of a reprise of footballers rapping.
13th May 2004