The Farce is strong with this one...
Good Will Vader
As a brilliant but isolated Jedi, all Anakin really needed was someone to love him for himself, instead of his abilities to manipulate fruit telekinetically. Enter a psychiatrist (Robin Williams), a man who understands the fragile nature of talent.
He argues with Anakin's pushy and exploitative master Obi-Wan about looking out for the young Jedi's welfare, instead of just using him for his gift, and also encourages the implosive Anakin to discuss his difficulties in therapy sessions, culminating in wails of "I guess I've always used my powers as a way of getting attention. I just wanted to be a somebody, instead of a nobody.
He then manages instantaneously to solve all of Anakin's lifelong selfdestructive neuroses by repeating the words "It's not your fault." Group hugs and flowing tears ensue.
Intergalactic Beauty
Now retired from the order of the Jedi, and struggling to support himself using on meagre Jedi pension, Anakin takes up a new office day job. Soon growing disillusioned with his repetitive lifestyle and his wife Padme's increasing suburban superficiality, Anakin begins to have an existential crisis.
He eventually finds inner peace and concludes that the meaning of life is in the small things, for example recreationally filming dead birds and plastic bags with a camcorder, discovering that "there's so much beauty in the universe.
Friday Nights at Home
Expelled from the order of the Jedi for increasingly disruptive behaviour, a now pathologically ambitious and vain Anakin turns to American football in order to satisfy his competitive instincts, leaving a severely post-natally depressed Padme at home alone to take care of the kids. Soon he becomes as achievement-obsessed as in his previous Jedi days, performing brilliantly, but once again alienating his peers with increasingly arrogant and competitive behaviour.
However on the eve of the final game of the season, Anakin is moved by a speech by team coach Billy Bob Thornton, who tells him that "being perfect is not about winning, it's about having good relationship with your family and friends." Seeing the error of his ways, Anakin returns home to his wife and kids, also making sure to set aside some extra time every week to go bowling with C3P0.
26th May 2005