The real criminals
Breaking bonkers rules is becoming something of a habit for Balliol English finallist Sam Brown, who, not content with his fine for allegedly deriding the sexuality of a police horse, was covered in feathers following his exams in a clear contravention of the Proctors’ exam celebrations code. As any reasonable person will agree, neither breach of these funtaxing rules harms anyone.
Indeed, quite to whom ‘harassment, alarm or distress’ (the public order offence under which Brown was charged for his equine ‘insults’) was caused remains unclear, but if Thames Valley Police would like to inform us we would be very willing to share it with our readers.
What is most intriguing is that Brown was fined the ridiculous sum of £80 �" exactly the same amount just four of the 14 thugs who smashed up the White Hart as part of the Bullingdon Club’s drunken party in Michaelmas term were fined as a result of the alleged £492 of criminal damage they did (in reality it was probably a lot more).
Clearly, Brown’s drunken comments do not equate with the Bullingdon Club’s antics in the slightest, the fining of Brown proving yet again how the law is unduly harsh in relation to minor ‘offences’.
If Thames Valley Police have nothing better to do than utilise eight officers to make an arrest for a silly series of drunken comments �" including the hugely patronising assumption that to call a horse ‘gay’ is actually an abusive comment �" then perhaps they should seriously re-examine their crimefighting priorities.
Likewise, if the Proctors insist on implementing their draconian and puritan rules on celebrating the end of an intensely stressful period, canny students such as Brown will shift the fun from their gaze. Good luck to them.
2nd Jun 2005