The Oxford Student - Official Student Newspaper

This mediocre second album from lifeless Liverpudlian Brit-rockers The Stands tries to do too much and never does anything. Its sounds range from Blur to Simon and Garfunkel, from The Verve to The Rolling Stones, but The Stands never achieve anything half as good as their inspirations. The album, Horse Fabulous, has eleven weak songs. The singing is devoid of any emotion, the instrumentation lacks any creativity and the rhythm section is hollow.

The Stand’s whiny singer Howie Payne sounds like Liam Gallagher gone wrong: Payne is consistently out of tune, his melodies lack hooks, and his lyrics are not worth a mention. About half of Horse Fabulous’s songs are dressed up with string and brass sections, but bland orchestral backing can’t make dull songs any less dull. ‘Nearer Than Green’ and ‘You Said’ try to be epic in a ‘Bittersweet Symphony’ kind of way but utterly fail.

The Stands attempt countryrock in five tracks on this album, but with slow tempos and bland performances, The Stands are no match for genuinely exciting retro-country-rockers like The Kings of Leon. The album’s single ‘Dolt Like You Like’ is the least worst track " a bit of energy and some Lennonish layered stationary harmonies make the song tolerable, but hackneyed blues guitar does it no favours. Some bands take time to find their sound, but The Stands are beyond hope.

They will never be a good band. Without song-writing talent, instrumental prowess, or any spark, they will be passed over and forgotten. Hardly a tragedy.

2nd Jun 2005