Trinity Goat Gag Refuses To Blow Over
Trinity College has yet again fallen victim to a carefullyorchestrated attack by archrival Balliol, this time finding its boat house adorned with the words ‘Trinity Blows Goats’ daubed in super-strength garage floor paint. To avoid CCTV cameras, the perpetrators swam across the river about 4am on Saturday morning, I can reveal, daubing the offensive words just in time for them to dry before the start of Summer Eights later in the day.
At present, Balliol old boys are suspected regarding the latest incident, my man with the paintbrush reveals. But undergraduates have nevertheless been asked by JCR President Triona Giblin in an email to turn themselves in, revealing acting dean Doug Dupree is: ‘Very cross as removing the gloss paint from the brick wall is going to be an expensive job. He spent most of Saturday trying to apologise to the President of Trinity [Hon Michael Beloff].'
Of course it’s not the first time 450-year-old Trinity has been accused of caprine copulation, just last term it took put-upon Trinity porters several hours to saw through the bicycle D-locks used to secure an Oxford Mail newsboard shackled to the college gates with the same phrase utilised.
The same slogan was also displayed alongside a Balliol crest in Port Meadow last summer, the three incidents revealing the clandestine Lime Society, named after the enigmatic Harry Lime of Graham Greene’s novella The Third Man, is still alive and well.
2nd Jun 2005