College hit by small condom crisis
Brasenose College plans to order extra- large condoms following complaints from students that the condoms provided are too small. Safex condoms, available in the dispensing machines, are reported to be “a little on the small side”, according to an email circulated by Rhiannon Williams, the Brasenose Welfare Representative. Christine Quigley, Brasenose JCR president, confirmed that several students have made complaints about condom sizes.
“The condoms we give out are supplied by OUSU.The Safex brand they have started to stock do appear to be a tad smaller than other brands”.
However, Safex have stated that their condoms conform to legal standards and claim to be the same size as Passante condoms, the brand that OUSU used to supply. Williams reports that she has closely examined the condoms and compared the two brands. “When compared to Passante condoms they are actually the same length and width.
However, after the condom inspection Williams concluded the lubrication used on the two brands of condom differ slightly. Williams believes the Safex lubricant may make the condom feel smaller. Francesco Ciardi, a member of the Brasenose welfare committee, told The Oxford Student, “I have a massive schlong and small condoms just aren’t good enough. I am very concerned by the dangers a small condom poses and the possibility of conceiving another illegitimate child”
However, the Safex company has confirmed that all their condoms are tested electronically and held to a high standard. Other Oxford colleges have not been experiencing condom size complaints.
A student at Wadham, wishing to remain anonymous, said “I don’t know what all this fuss is about condoms being too small - I find them huge, I wish OUSU would start stocking trim sizes.” Rhiannon Williams said, “The decision to change was made on the basis of serious complaints which effect student welfare. “I received several comments that the Safex ‘normal’ condoms were smaller/tighter than other brands, and a more serious complaint where a condom had split. Obviously I took this seriously, as condoms splitting is worrying and distressing for a couple involved and potentially could have serious implications.”
While many students have found the call for extra-large condoms amusing, some are keen to stress the importance of using safe contraception. Oli Garthwaite, a languages student at Brasenose, said, “Condoms prevent diseases and save lives, even if a really hot girl begs you not to use it, you should say no”.
11th May 2006