Who?…Doctor’s Who’s the Tardis

What people don’t understand about me is that I am more than a Police box, more than a time machine. I am the ultimate Doctor’s companion.

I am a Time And Relative Dimension(s) In Space, or more specifically a Type 40 TT Tardis.

Unfortunately, as I am constantly being reminded, I am not quite as… modern… as some of my colleagues.

I’m blamed if we land a few decades before we should, if we’re pulled a few galaxies over or if any general maintenance issues should cause disaster to ensue.

No one thinks to blame his bad driving.

That vwoar sound I make as I land: someone’s finally told him it’s ‘cos he leaves the hand brake on, but will it make a blind bit of difference?

You’d think considering my reputation, a big blue police box would be noticeable in the 21st century Britain. But no, no matter where I am, be it Ancient Rome, the planet XX, Elizabethan England or the middle of a space ship, I may as well not exist.

I’d expect to hear at least someone question the presence of a police box, but instead their glances slide straight past me. It’s a lonely existence.

Is it glamorous being a Tardis? It’s a question I would get asked a lot if anybody ever noticed me.

In answer, I’d have to say it’s about as glamorous as being an aeroplane.

Sure, I have the capacity to materialise and dematerialise and fly short distances through space, but like an aeroplane, once I’ve reached my destination, I’m parked till the big man gets through with whatever disaster he’s landed me in.

He doesn’t care that I’ve stepped in to save his life more times than I count. I’m always ready to jump in at the last moment to whisk him away.

I’m stuck on the outside looking in, waiting for the call to action whilst aliens wander past completely ignoring me. I have to watch, under-appreciated, as he strolls in, his latest floozy on his arm, chat up line ready on the lips “as you can see, it’s a lot bigger on the inside then you’d think.”, each one wider-eyed and younger than the last.

Plus, I think he’s developing a thing for red-heads. Each one saves a few planets and starts looking doe-eyed at him, but I know they’ll never last. A few series at most.

Not like me, companion to the Doctor for eternity.