Sausage scorcher at Lincoln

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Students at Lincoln have been praising the actions of a “heroic Porter” after he swiftly put out a fire that had started in external student accommodation.

The fire took place in a Museum Road house kitchen, and a student who witnessed the event revealed that the two culprits “were grilling sausages with the oven door closed”, and that subsequently “when they opened the door, a fire started”.

He continued: “With cool-headed deliberacy, they proceeded to yelp and prance about, stab the break-glass, throw the fire blanket onto the flames and evacuate.”

The Porter was fetched and swiftly “dealt with the problem…presumably by retrieving the blanket from the blaze and reapplying it safely, turning off the power to the grill.”

The witness concluded: “When all was under control, he strolled out and placated the adrenaline-fueled scamps, observing, “You don’t know how to use the fire blanket, then?””

Lincoln students were informed of the calamitous event by an email sent out by Rachel Buxton, the Domestic Bursar, which read: “This is the first fire we have had at Lincoln for many years. Fortunately the porter got there quickly, turned off the grill, and put out the fire with the fire blanket. No-one was hurt, and damage was minimal.”

The email also explained that the fire was caused because “when they opened the door to the grill the draught caused the fat on the grill pan to catch light”.

Buxton did, however, warn that if a fire did break out in the future, they were “not [to] use an extinguisher – they are for trained personnel such as porters only”.

A Lincoln fresher commented on the matter: “These are the actions of an absolutely heroic Porter, consistently saving our sausages.”

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