Mission mmm-possible at RAG burrito competition

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Chief BurritoA RAG burrito eating competition that took place at Oriel College this week was branded “one of the most disgusting events I’ve worked on”, by RAG Vice-President Ben Rosenbaum.

With teams of five competing relay-style to consume their burritos as quickly as possible, Los Burritos Hermanos, a Lincoln-St John’s team, were crowned victors of the men’s tournament, and the St Hugh’s-based Bin Raiders did enough to win the women’s category.

The food, enough to feed over 40 participants, was provided by Mission Burrito. Even before the eating began, psychological warfare was well underway as the contestants each chose the contents of their individual burritos. While other teams tended to eschew the over-chewy steak option, Raph ‘Piggy’ Torrance, captain of the Hermanos, went as far as to scoff at those who selected a chicken filling.

The scoffing began in earnest once the Hall’s tables had been covered with jugs of water, valuable lubrication for the tournament’s scholar-athletes. Fresh from their dynamic warm-up, the Hermanos were forced to wait 30 seconds by an administrative error, but made swift amends as Nathan O’Neill, renowned for his 56-second finish last year, inhaled his burrito like a vacuum cleaner.

Michael Zhang lived up to his ‘Chief’ nickname by following suit. Tom Ough, who completed Mission Burrito’s ‘El Triple’ challenge earlier this year with the fastest time in the city, was almost stopped in his tracks by some ill-chopped veg, but the team rode out the storm, Torrance and Phil Coales storming home to seal what Rosenbaum confirmed to be “an absolutely terrifying time of seven minutes and five seconds.”

With the next-best team clocking in at over 12 minutes, it was a well-deserved victory for the Hermanos. But it was a memorable day for the all-female Bin Raiders too, even though victory was guaranteed by the lack of competition, as they flew the female flag in a sport in which women are traditionally under-represented.

Rosenbaum later hailed the tournament as a “fantastic event that raised £205 for the four RAG charities [Giving What We Can, Students Supporting Street Kids, The Oxford Food Bank, Education Partnerships Africa], which were chosen by the student body last term.”

Bin Raiders captain Jade Carlotta-Jones was similarly effusive, revealing that “I like burritos.” But the final word had to go to Nathan O’Neill, who spoke exclusively to The Oxford Student the morning after his triumph: “Just thought you’d like to know, my shit had whole black beans in it: the stool of champions.”