8 Times The Vatican Did It First

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  1. Dude looks like a lady! Michelangelo promoted questioning of gender stereotypes – check out these Sistine chap(ettes)…


1Michelangelo; detailing from the Genesis scene, ceiling of The Sistine Chapel , The Vatican Museum”

“Do you even lift, bro?”

Proof from Michelangelo’s sketches show that all of his women were anatomically based on the bodies of male models. This explains the bulging biceps, thighs, and shoulders, which share little in common with other women painted in the era. Where some argue his apparent distaste for the traditional representation of the female form stemmed from his sexuality, others claim that his exploration instead pushes the viewer to question the way certain religious ideas and biblical concepts, manifested themselves as part of the everyday. This could be seen particularly interesting in light of Eve and her representation of sin, sexuality, knowledge and the fall from grace.

 



2. “The Photobomb!”

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Raphael; The Parnassus (1509-10), Vatican Museums


 
     3. When anyone who was anyone had a boob job

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Michelangelo; Night from the Medici tomb, Florence

 

I mean…

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Michelangelo, The Last Judgement, The Sistine Chapel, Rome

 

…I MEAN….

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Artemis of Ephesus, The Vatican, Rome (unknown artist) –  Marie-Lan Nguyen / Wikimedia Commons

Two in the wrong place were bad enough, but apparently two ain’t enough for this Turkish goddess of fertility (N.B. Different interpretations have placed this multi-breasted masterpiece as potentially sporting many eggs, or indeed testicles if you will, to show signs of fertility).

 


     4. Those ‘before’ and ‘afters’

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Left: Michelangelo Buonarroti; Last Judgment (1534-41), Sistine Chapel, Vatican.
Right: Marcello Venusti; Last Judgment,  Museo e gallerie nazionali di Capodimonte. 

Whereas Pope Clement VII, who commissioned The Last Judgement, accepted Michelangelo’s artistic choices, his follower Pope Pius IV was not so happy. Consequentially another artist, Daniele da Volterra, was employed to add ‘breeches’ to the nudes. The painting has recently been restored to a state deemed truer to that of the original.


 

5. “The Candid”: avoiding having subjects in the painting looking out (probably in order to create a ‘natural’ look that could be used for a more effective indie cover photo)

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Raphael, School of Athens (1509-1510), Vatican Museums



6. Oops, apart from the person who was ‘taking the picture’ (I should probably say the painter, here) #selfie #poser

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Raphael, detailing from School of Athens (1509-1510), Vatican Museums

Looking good Raph. Shame instagram doesn’t have a ‘School of Athens’ filter. I reckon surrounding oneself with famous philosophers would be the ultimate way to make sure you get more than 10 likes.


7. The evolution of the selfie didn’t stop there. Michelangelo went all out in pioneering #natural and #nomakeup respectively. (Although possibly not for breast cancer charity, as we’ve already established he had very little commitment to that area of things.)

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“Michelangelo, Giudizio Universale 31” by Michelangelo Buonarroti 

The Last Judgement was painted much later years in Michelangelo’s life, when he was suitably old and decrepit. In accordance with such a state, the artist chose to depict himself hiding in the face of the skin held up by St. Bartholomew; this is found in the bottom- right corner of the painting.

 


 

8. #hatersgonhate

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http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3AMichelangelo-minos2.jpg

Having been heavily criticized for the nudes by Cardinal Baigio da Cesena, Michelangelo decided to return the critique. He chose to paint the papal master in the depths of hell, complete with donkey (or ass) ears, and entwined in a rather unorthodox and spectacularly uncomfortable position with a serpent…

 

 

 


 

Image credits

Michelangelo; detailing from the Genesis scene, ceiling of The Sistine Chapel , The Vatican Museum”
Michelangelo Buonarroti 022″ by Michelangelo Buonarroti – The Yorck Project: 10.000 Meisterwerke der Malerei. DVD-ROM, 2002. ISBN 3936122202. Distributed by DIRECTMEDIA Publishing GmbH.. Licensed under Public domain via Wikimedia Commons – http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Michelangelo_Buonarroti_022.jpg#mediaviewer/File:Michelangelo_Buonarroti_022.jpg)

Raphael; The Parnassus (1509-10), Vatican Museums
(“Raphael – The Parnassus” by Raphael – See below.. Licensed under Public domain via Wikimedia Commons – http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Raphael_-_The_Parnassus.jpg#mediaviewer/File:Raphael_-_The_Parnassus.jpg)

Michelangelo; Night from the Medici tomb, Florence
(“Tomb of Giuliano de’ Medici (casting in Pushkin museum)
{{WikipediaUser:Shakko/Credit}}

Left: Michelangelo Buonarroti; Last Judgment (1534-41), Sistine Chapel, Vatican.
Right: Marcello Venusti; Last Judgment,  Museo e gallerie nazionali di Capodimonte. Images and original data provided by SCALA, Florence/ART RESOURCE, N.Y.; artres.com | (c) 2006, SCALA, Florence/ART RESOURCE, N.Y.

Raphael, School of Athens (1509-1510), Vatican Museums
“Sanzio 01” by Raphael – Stitched together from vatican.va. Licensed under Public domain via Wikimedia Commons – http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Sanzio_01.jpg#mediaviewer/File:Sanzio_01.jpg

Raphael, detailing from School of Athens (1509-1510), Vatican Museums
“Sanzio 01 Zoroaster Ptolmey” by Raphael – Web Gallery of Art:   Image  Info about artwork. Licensed under Public domain via Wikimedia Commons – http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Sanzio_01_Zoroaster_Ptolmey.jpg#mediaviewer/File:Sanzio_01_Zoroaster_Ptolmey.jpg [user: Jacobulus]

“Michelangelo, Giudizio Universale 31” by Michelangelo Buonarroti – Web Gallery of Art:   Image  Info about artwork. Licensed under Public domain via Wikimedia Commons –http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Michelangelo,_Giudizio_Universale_31.jpg#mediaviewer/File:Michelangelo,_Giudizio_Universale_31.jpg [[Category:Photographs by User:Sailko]]

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3AMichelangelo-minos2.jpg

 

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