[Note: the article that follows is a work of satire, and therefore should not be taken as factual]
Jonathan Baker, a rower for St. John’s College, is shockingly not a total prick whose sole personality trait is rowing. The fourth year engineer, who reportedly didn’t once mention that he was a rower during a night out at Park End, is by all reports affable and normal.
“I was shocked when I heard he was a rower” said Emily Parks, a third year chemist from St. Hilda’s who ran into Mr. Baker at Park End. “He bought me a drink and we started talking. He was obviously an athlete given how fit he is, but he just said he worked out and left it at that”.
