Oxford's biggest student newspaper, produced by and for members of the University of Oxford, since 1991.
Satire and Student Features
Image Description: A cartoon image of roasted meat on a red and orange background with the words: “Sunday Roast: Featuring the Stories that didn’t quite leave the newsroom” From snowfalls to carols to Christmas trees, 7th Week has felt Oxmassy in all the right ways. But the festive spirit does not deaden the razor-sharp reporting […]
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Image Description: a number of dictionaries on a book shelf. ATIK: see ‘Park End’ Brookes: the ones you swipe left on on dating apps. “Brookes not books / 6’1 and that’s 2 separate measurements xx 😉” Crewdate: only if a courageous ally orchestrates a highly targeted ABC will the prospective romantic walk away with an […]
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Image description: The text “Dates of Our Lives” on a pink and purple background Many moons ago, I had matched with dear Billy but we didn’t meet up because he was off to work on a vineyard over summer. Rah! He asked to meet up when he returned and I agreed before promptly forgetting all […]
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Image Description: A cartoon image of roasted meat on a red and orange background with the words: “Sunday Roast: Featuring the Stories that didn’t quite leave the newsroom” MT21 hurtles on at breakneck speed, and the pace hasn’t let up for Rordon Gamsay, the OxStu’s official nosy parker, either. This week he bent over backwards […]
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Image Description: An Oxford tutorial being conducted In a article published earlier this term Asher Weisz, OxYou’s foremost (and arguably only) journalist, argued that the best way to ensure success at Oxford is to ‘do as little work as possible, and make sure your tutors love you’. This bold and (let’s be honest) accurate statement […]
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Image description: the text Dates of Our Lives on a pink and purple background It was almost 5th week and in an attempt to get ahead of the potential 5th Week Blues, I headed home. Home to sweet sweet Cardiff. The train journey was long. And for all of you who live in the sprawling […]
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Image Description: A cartoon image of roasted meat on a red and orange background with the words: “Sunday Roast: Featuring the Stories that didn’t quite leave the newsroom” If 5th Week got you down, fear not: Rordon Gamsay has remained as stubbornly and annoyingly productive as ever, and found time in-between his essay crisis, emotional […]
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Image Description: A room of hacks I am now in my third year. The grey hairs are appearing one by one in my curly locks and the sum of my wisdom has grown so vast that I have backache from carrying it about in my enormous head. The Greeks believed that the greatest wisdom came […]
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Image Description: A cartoon image of roasted meat on a red and orange background with the words: “Sunday Roast: Featuring the Stories that didn’t quite leave the newsroom” Another week, another roast… For this edition, Rordon Gamsay hit new lows in pursuit of the elusive beast that is News, appearing on a dishonoured TV station and […]
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Image Description: a gravestone bearing the words ‘RIP OxCORT, 2007-2021’ OxCORT, tutors’ equivalent of “RateMyProfessor.com”, was found murdered on 22nd October, just weeks after its fourteenth birthday. Its death was confirmed last Thursday night by Shane Cuff, Chief Information Officer at the Oxford IT Services, who had been OxCORT’s supervisor since 2018. OxCORT reportedly suffered […]
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Image description: The text “dates of our lives” on a pink and purple background There I was, dear readers. On, yes, another date. And before you start to psychoanalyse me and probe to find out who hurt me and why I’m like this let me stop you there. Why do I date so much that […]
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Image Description: A cartoon image of roasted meat on a red and orange background with the words: “Sunday Roast: Featuring the Stories that didn’t quite leave the newsroom” It’s Sunday [Editor’s note: sort of], which means that Rordon Gamsay, the OxStu’s reigning Snakes and Ladders champion, is back with some more news stories that other journalists […]
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Image description: two students at work, 2021 (colourised). The screen stares at you, accusingly. The clock ticks, accusingly. In the morning, your scout will come in to find you slumped over your desk with coffee stains on your t-shirt and they will look at you, accusingly, and will ask, accusingly, if they should empty your […]
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It started as all great love stories do. We matched on Tinder, his account was permanently blocked, he tracked me down on Instagram, we finally met in person and then I realised he wasn’t the one for me. The characters in this tragic love story are myself, naturally as a deeply narcissistic individual, and a […]
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Image description: a student calmly reading from a large pile of academic books The inquisitive reader may be wondering: ‘what is a reading list?’, or ‘what do I do with one?’ For humanities students this may be the bane of your existence; for the science student, a mysterious entity. Either way, worry not—no one really […]
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Image Description: A cartoon image of roasted meat on a red and orange background with the words: “Sunday Roast: Featuring the Stories that didn’t quite leave the newsroom”. This week, roving reporter Rordon Gamsay failed to obtain tickets for the Varsity ski trip or the Union ball. However, he did manage to find all these juicy […]
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Image Description: A cartoon image of roasted meat on a red and orange background with the words: “Sunday Roast: Featuring the Stories that didn’t quite leave the newsroom”. By now the Oxford student body has realised it’s probably time to actually do their degree. It can’t be fun and Freshers’ flu all the time! But never […]
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Image Description: A cartoon image of roasted meat on a red and orange background with the words: “Sunday Roast: Featuring the Stories that didn’t quite leave the newsroom”. In a return as triumphant as that of the Jedi, the King, or your termly SFE payment, the OxStu’s most high-profile and incident-prone reporter Rordon Gamsay returns to […]
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Image Description: a picture of a night out in Oxford with lots of students definitely having lots of fun. Never been clubbing in Oxford? Yeah, neither have we. Let two second years impart their wisdom on the local nightlife scene, formulated over a lockdown Michaelmas, a virtual Hilary, and a sort-of normal Trinity. Useless […]
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