Oxford's biggest student newspaper, produced by and for members of the University of Oxford, since 1991.
Satire and Student Features
Image description: Boris Johnson holds a Cabinet meeting It must be difficult being Boris Johnson. For our would-be World King, a Cabinet reshuffle is a delicate balance. The Prime Minister has to traverse a narrow tight rope: he must not promote anyone too talented that could make him look bad in comparison, but he must […]
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Image description: Text in neon purple reading “awkward Tinder dates here” on a dark purple background Picture this: you have crawled out of the depths of lockdown. You have cast off the oversized jumper you have been basically living in for days. With one swipe of your arm the pizza boxes piled high from your […]
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The end of summer looms. August has begun to blur dangerously with September. Uni work can no longer be contemplated with the breezy dismissal of, ‘it doesn’t matter, term doesn’t start for months!’ It is dark before 9pm. And as summer comes to a close, so does the nation’s fling with the best/worst thing on […]
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Image description: White text on blue background asking for Creative Team applications: Illustrators, digital designers, and photographers Applications to join the Creative Team of the Oxford Student are now open. If you would like to be an artistic contributor in Michaelmas, now is your chance to apply! Click here for our application form All applications […]
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Image Description: The Women’s Rowing team at the 1908 Olympics. Sometimes they are undercover. You think: this man is so bad at football/hockey/cricket/swimming, that there is no way that he would sit in a sports bar during the ACTUAL Olympics making ‘insightful’ judgments about female athletes. It’s always so disappointing to find out that you […]
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Image description: Cowley Road at night What do you mean “deep Cowley”? Where the **** is the Christian Life Center? This must be further than Brookes! If you live East of Divinity Road, then you will have weathered these thinly veiled barbs from wide eyed ‘shallow Cowley’ dwellers. You will have endured the wrinkled lip […]
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Image Description: the words “Apply to be an Oxstu Editor. Apply through the online form. Open until 2nd July at 6pm.” on a plain blue background. Applications to join the Editorial team of the Oxford Student are now open. If you would like to be a Section Editor or Deputy Section Editor in Michaelmas, now […]
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Image Description: A cartoon image of roasted meat on a red and orange background with the words: “Sunday Roast: Featuring the Stories that didn’t quite leave the newsroom”. Rordon Gamsay is now on his way home after an eventful term, which included being kidnapped on Holywell Street and running for SU President. He has, however, one […]
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Image Description: A cartoon image of roasted meat on a red and orange background with the words: “Sunday Roast: Featuring the Stories that didn’t quite leave the newsroom”. After a week off (fifth week hit Rordon hard), our resident student *journalist* returned this week to the streets of Oxford in the pursuit of a good story. […]
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Once again on zero sleep, Rordon remains dazed, confused, and dazed again. Too much work, too little sleep. And yet Rordon admits that he only does English – surely he should have the freedom to write smash hit articles all the time (shameless plug for the Eurovision Top 10 xoxo). And yet… he doesn’t. But […]
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Image Description: A white middle-aged man in a crowd of people. This week’s alumni is Alan Allen, an accountant from Worthing who continues to describe himself as being in his ‘mid-to-late thirties’ despite turning 40 later this year. Allen graduated from Oxford in 2002 with a perfectly acceptable 2:2 in History, and now works as […]
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Image Description: A cartoon image of roasted meat on a red and orange background with the words: “Sunday Roast: Featuring the Stories that didn’t quite leave the newsroom”. It’s fourth week, which means that there are only four more weeks to go! Rordon has been particularly busy this week, which is why he might have […]
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Rordon Gamsay has returned from the plane of existence he ascended to last week. He has also managed to escape Holywell Street’s weird wailing. These two things are not connected, but you are forgiven for thinking so. As seems to be the case near-permanently, he has far too much work considering his status as a […]
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Rordon Gamsay has recovered (almost) from May Day by resetting his body clock and ascending to a higher plane of existence. He has currently been awake for over 72 hours. He is no longer sure how to spell his own name, or the word ‘yacht’? ‘yot’? Zero clue, zero cares, zero sleep. His term is […]
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Image Description: A cartoon image of roasted meat on a red and orange background with the words: “Sunday Roast: Featuring the Stories that didn’t quite leave the newsroom”. After handing in his collections only 96 hours late, Rordon Gamsay panicked and forgot that he was meant to be doing this news thing. So he rushed […]
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Image Description: a cartoon image of an unidentified roasted meat on a red and orange background, featuring the words “Sunday Roast: featuring the stories that didn’t quite leave the newsroom”. Rordon Gamsay has returned to Oxford and resumed his investigations of all the stories that the *five* Oxford newspapers forgot to look into this week. […]
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Image Description: a crying Oxfess logo on a dark blue background After a brief hiatus for the vacation, Rordon Gamsay is back with a big announcement. All this time, he has been an Oxfess admin, and he’s now prepared to spill the secrets behind everyone’s favourite(?) Facebook page! I start every morning in the same […]
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Image description: newspaper clippings with the words ‘agony aunt’ written in block letters. For many, 8th week is a period where work slows down and they can piss away their time going on Wikipedia deep-dives about the supercontinent Pangea, or in non-pandemic days, getting thoroughly shit-faced at every beer garden situated within the OX postcode. Alas, […]
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Image Description: Old man smiling with a Spectator mug and an open laptop with a George Orwell quote You may have decided to read this article because you are interested in pursuing student journalism. Or you may be here out of spite and hatred. Student journalists, like real journalists, are rarely held in high esteem […]
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